Monday, February 3, 2020

"Daddy Issues" Hype or Reality









"Daddy issues" is an informal phrase for the psychological challenges resulting from an absent or abnormal relationship with one’s father, often manifesting in a distrust of or sexual desire for, men who act as father figures.


Recently, the death of basketball great, Kobe Bryant, his daughter Gigi and seven others, has magnified relationships between girls and their dads.

It has ignited a movement, a hashtag going around, #girldad, which has captured the hearts of many.

Dads all over the world are posting pictures of them and their daughters.
In a world of “girl power” and “the future is female’, this just furthers the notion, there is something special which happens when a girl and her father bond.

However, today I am not writing about dads who are active in their children’s lives. Rather, I am talking about girls who do not grow up with their fathers or who have an estranged relationship with them issues with dads are real.


Some may find the term “daddy issues” an offensive term but the truth is, it is not meant to be. It is simple a brilliant way in saying your relationship with your dad or lack of it, affects your interactions with other people and situations.

In order to explain the “why” in any given circumstance, we must take an in depth look at the origins of it. For example, take the recent outbreak of Coronavirus in China and other countries. It has left the medical experts asking the question why and how this happened.

 To answer the question why, they have begun to backtrack the steps of those who have been affected.

This is the same thing that is been played out when we begin to examine what it means to have “daddy issues”. When we begin to look deep into the past of women and girls who do not have a strong father and daughter bond.





What are some of the signs someone may have daddy issues?

 Let’s look at them.



Trust

One of the signs is having an issue with trust. You may feel as if you are going to always experience what you have in the past. On the flip side, you may fear the new experience that is before you. If you never knew your father as I never have, you may have been left to feel a lack of affirmation in certain areas which may have caused a disconnect when it came to be able to trust.

Some of you had a close relationship with your father but may have experienced other issues due to it being strained. So, it is not just that you may have not known your father, but it could also be the fact that the relationship is dysfunctional in ways for whatever reason.



Older Is Better

There are some women who are attracted to older men not only for security purposes but because they are wanting a father figure in their lives. We are constantly told women are attracted to security and for the most part this is true. However, if this need is due to the need of a women’s endless desire for affirmation, then a “daddy issue” could be at play.



Can’t Be Alone

For some women being alone is not an option. They are constantly on the hunt for the new guy or the new relationship. It is like a constant roller coaster. In and out of relationships trying to get the affirmations and approval which was not given by their father. There is absolutely nothing wrong with desiring a partner. We all do for the most part. However, when you make that your purpose in life then ‘Houston we have a problem’. Here is why you may find yourself in a dead-end relationship which is not going anywhere.



Insecurity

Have you ever let your emotions get the best of you? Have you ever had a good guy and you treated him like the bad one you have had? Are you smothering your mate? If so then it is possible you have “daddy issues”. It is better to know and be aware of them so that you can properly deal with them.


Being aware will only make you a better person who is able to build better relationships.

Keep in mind every woman and girl who have not had a close or healthy bond with their father is in this category.  Self-examine your actions and relationship interactions. Look at your relationship patterns and this will help you assess whether or not you may have unresolved "daddy issues".

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